The Blitzer and Ball that went "Poof!"

The Coach looked at the bag of coins just handed to him by the Nere-do-well hired to deliver the purse to “even” up the match.  He shook his head and sighed.  The Slammers had a well-deserved and well-earned reputation for brutality.  They were Orcs after all and delighted in putting the “blood” into Blood Bowl!

Yes, he could try to incentivize his players to perform (to a degree) with the extra money… but his players were already proud elves and he wasn’t certain the meager one hundred “k” and change was enough.  No, no… a better investment would be… YES!!!

He snapped his fingers and one of the assistants poked his head in, “Yes, coach?!”

“Grab one of the ball-boys… and hurry! On the double!” He scribbled a quick note and stuffed it in the bag, just as the ball boy showed up.” 

“Coach?!” a terrified look on his face, assuming he had done something wrong.

“Did you see any wizards in the stand as we came into the stadium?” the Coach asked.

“Er, I think so…” the boy retorted.

“Quick, Go find him and give him this pouch! I have one gold shilling for you if your extra quick when you return!” The coach said with a mirthful smile.

The boy’s eyes lit up.  He nodded his head up and down with enthusiasm, grabbing the bag and sprinting out of the locker room as quickly as his spindly legs would go!

Over 2,800 fans showed up to watch the Titans and the Slammers in this epic play-off match! The Slammers won the toss and elected to receive the ball.  After lining up, the Titans squared off to begin their agile game against the thundering Orc brutes of the Swinging Slammers.

The Orcs received the kick-off and right out of the gate, Big No1 “Knuckle Duster” got a casualty, setting the tone for the match! With chorded muscle, and strong, short strides on monstrous feet and legs… the Slammers started their drive up the field!

One casualty, two, a knock-out! Then Galandour the Great, the Titan’s star blitzer went down puked on by McStompy, the Slammers untrained Troll! The cheers from the Titans fans stopped, while the cheers and jeers from the Slammers fans rose to a deafening cacophony. The team Apothecary was quickly dispatched, and Galandour was taken off the field on a stretcher with everyone's hopes that he would return to the pitch.

The Slammers were (well) slamming the Titans!  With only two turns left to go in the first half and within eight paces of the touchline, the Titan’s coach was panicked. His eyes scanned the stadium… did the boy deliver the purse? Was the message received?

Then he saw him, blue hat, spectacles… oh no! Not… yes… there he was, Horatio X Schottenheim himself! Not well known for his prowess as a wizard (and more for his news reporting) the coach knew Horatio to be a die-hard Blood Bowl fan, but unreliable at best with his spell-casting.  So, the coach crossed his fingers… and waited!

Just as No7, Kurzatt the Blitzer from the Slammers finished moving up the pitch, POOF a puff of smoke and a loud ZAP was heard!  There, where Kurzatt used to be, was a helpless little frog! Oh, glory be!  Down four players, and with most of his team scattered on the pitch, the Titans now had a chance!!! The Titan fans stood up and began cheering so loudly, that it was difficult to even hear ones self think!

With the frog, dropping the ball, it bounced to Eltharion, the Titan’s thrower! He caught the ball and nimbly dodged away for a pass.  The crowd was going nuts!!! The famed High Elf thrower cocked his arm back to throw and… the adrenalin proved too much! Eltharion fumbled the pass, and then the unthinkable happened, Grirzruk the Gravekeeper, a Big'Un Blocker blitzed Eltharion, scooped up the ball and ran it in for a touchdown! ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!!!!

Just as quickly as the Titan fan base exploded in revere, they were silent.  And just as if someone had flipped a light switch, the Slammers fans erupted, feet pounding the East side stadium bleechers almost causing a collapse!

Knowing they needed to make-up ground, the Titans pitched the ball to Valiananore, who sprinted in for an early touchdown tying up the score!

Enthused by the play, as the Titans lined up for the next drive, several teammates cleared the stars from their heads, patched up their wounds and took to the pitch.  The Titan's kick proved to be too much, and the ball went out of bounce, only to be tossed back in from the sideline to one of the Slammer’s star blitzers.

The Titans rushed forward, slamming into the muscled Orcs frenzied by their desire to move on to the next round of the play-offs.  The Orcs and Elves spent the next several turns smashing and bashing each other to bits! McStompy even tried to empty the contents of his stomach onto the horde! All but empty—he could only manage to dry-heave!

With some brilliant key blocks, and an incredible break-away play, the Titans managed to score again, bringing the game to a 2-1 lead!

With only one turn left to go, the Slammers had no hope of scoring.  But, the Slammers coach, in a brilliant move, called time-out for a review of the play for the last Titan score.  The refs, after reviewing the play (with a little bit of extra coin and a large group of looming Slammer fans to motivate them) called back the turns, giving the Slammers an opportunity to even the score!

What a game!!! The fans were on edge, everyone was watching now with two turns left as the Slammers got into position.  Lining up critical blocks, the Big'Un blockers were able to open a hole for Drimzrod the Blitzer to get through into the open! He churned down the field, closing the gap between himself and the touch line! The Slammer fans started screaming at the top of their lungs, “20! 15! 10! 5!...” the frenzied crowd went CRAZY!!!! HE WAS GOING TO MAKE IT!!! THE GAME WAS GOING INTO OVERTIME!!!! THIS WAS NUTS!!!!  Then, all of the sudden, everyone went dead silent… you could have heard a pin drop!!!

Just as Drimzrod was crossing the touchline, his momentum overtook him; the burning and numbness in his legs was just too much! Losing his balance (and losing control of the ball) he went down in a tumbled heap!!! The Titans had just won the match!!!! THE TITANS HAD JUST WON THE MATCH!!! 

The crowd cheered.  The Titans players wiped generous moisture from their eyes.  A five-gallon jug of ice-cold Orcade was dumped over the coach, with a smile he couldn't seem to wipe from his face! The Titans will advance to the next round of play-offs.

Gyhrdrak the "Bonebreaker" Druchiisbane

Not much is known about Gyhrdrak Druchiisbane, also known in the Blood Bowl community as the “Bonebreaker.” It is reported that he hails from the more rural communal mountains of Chrace, in the Elven kingdom of Ulthwae. After relocating to the capital city of Tor Achare as a young man, he was selected for service among the Pheonix bodyguard known as the White Lions, where he distinguished himself.

Gyhrdrak plays as a star blitzer on the Tor Achare Lions Blood Bowl team, one of two professional teams hosted by the capital city. It is reported that Gyhrdrak is the strongest High Elf in all of Ulthuan. His propensity to cause numerous casualties each game is what has earned him the moniker “Bonebreaker.” His strength and Stature have become legendary not only throughout the six kingdoms of the High Elf realms, but ubiquitously among opposing teams on the grid-iron.

(Credit: Christopher Burdett; donwloaded from https://christopherburdett.blogspot.com/ 10.8.2024) 

Never compromising his performance on the pitch, as soon as an opposing player is red-boxed, Gyhrdrak is quick to lend a helping hand winning him many friends among other teams, star players and heroes of other mortal races. 

Ironically, Korhil Lionmane, who is the current high commander of the Chrace White Lions bodyguard, displays very similar characteristics to Gyhrdrak.  Whenever the “Bonebreaker” is performing on the grid-iron, Commander Korhil always seems to be conspicuously absent from his duties. However, due to his popularity, nobody (not even reporters) seem to care to comment. 

Regardless, look for Commander Kor… er um… Gyhrdrak the “Bonebreaker” for his next appearance on the pitch!

Read about Commander Korhil here: Korhil Lionmane | Warhammer Wiki | Fandom

Bernard “the Beastlord” Ratsunifuchīsukādo

 

In the world of Blood Bowl rat Doctor Caciocavallo was developing a new way of transportation. In the year 2060 a meteorite had hit the old world, inside a strange one-of-a-kind green crystal was extracted from the meteor and given to the young Doctor. Upon study and development he discovered the crystal could emit its atoms from one place to another. Dr. Caciocavallo was pleased with this and began creating a way to emit a person’s atoms from one place to another, the slow ride on boats would be no more. But the young doctor miscalculated and ripped a hole in the space time continuum. This is when Bernard came into play, his fate sealed to be a star player in the old world forever. Bernard was a young Football captain in the NFL, his team ranking number one in the world. This particular day Bernards team was one but a few points away from beating their opponent, Bernard simply had to make a touchdown. It began, Bernard was handed the ball and he really turned on the jets, running as fast as he could to the touchdown, he then saw a blue light shine in his eyes, and he dove for the touchdown. When he stood up he wasn’t in the same world he was before, it was dark and barren, armor on the floor and hands on the ground. The ground started shaking with a mighty rage, getting stronger and stronger. Bernard turned and saw before him a bunch of big mutated, metal plated, screeching rats! He began to run but then found himself being trampled and clawed by the feet of the rats, then it went dark. When he woke their stand a young rat, Dr. Caciocavallo, “Where am I?” Bernard asked. “I seem to have miscalculated, and I brought you to our dimension, and without another green crystal I can’t send you back to your world” the young doctor responded. Bernard had so many questions, but his body was so broken and in pain he could hardly mutter another word. “Your frail human body will survive here no longer, you have two choices, get injected with rat genes…or die a painful death” the doctor said. Bernard nodded and upon the serum entering his body, the human genes and rat genes mixed harshly, his body stared growing, muscles ripping to become larger, fur growing all over his body, horns bearing from his head. Bernard roared in pain as Dr. Caciocavallo fell to the floor in fear… ” I’ve created a star, a monster!…The beast lord of the rats.”

Bernard's Transformation

Bernard "the Beastlord" Ratsunifuchīsukādo transformation complete!

Lou Rollins - Salt Lake Open Hobby Track Scoring Rubric

Category 1 – Basic Painting (10 Possible)

·       Is the Army painted to at least a battle ready standard?

·       Yes! And I have put in a ton of extra effort!

Category 2 – Basic Techniques (5 Possible)

·       I have a uniform color and them across my Deathwatch army: Black, Red!

·       All my basecoats are applied with a “two thin coats!”

·      
Every unit, and every model are marked with their: kill-team number, squad marking, and battlefield profile!

·    If you look closely, you will see: edging, object source lighting, and highlights.

Category 3 – Advanced Techniques (8 Possible)

·       Everyone of my models has a high level highlighting and edging.

·       More than half of my army and models has been added in the last several months with advanced highlighting and edging, as well as OSL techniques!

·       Great Attention to detail on highlights, buckles, markings have been provided to every model in my army—even down to the grenades, scrolls and filigree.

·       More than half of my army has been painted in the last year, and has great attention to detail with glazing, washes, feathering and edging.

Category 4 – Expert Techniques (7 Possible)

·       All of the miniatures in my army have custom company markings on their knee-pads and in other obscure places. Any scrolls have names on them.

·       More than half of my army uses glazing, feathering, edging and masterclass blending techniques to get the “shine” on the black Deathwatch armor.

·       I hope this army leaves you feeling impassioned with the Hobby of Warhammer 40k!

Category 5 – Basing (5 Possible)

·       My army is definitely “Battle Ready!”

·       Many of my models not only have various textured bases, but they also have various xenos parts and appendages depending on which squad they are!

·       There are tiny little details all over my bases (look closely and see what treasures you can find!)

Category 6 – Conversions (4 Possible)

·       My entire army is kit-bashed! Most at a simple level, but a few at a very high level!

·       Every single model has a head-swap, weapon swap, rotated appendages, etc.

·       Several of my key characters and sergeants have extensive work done including, green-stuff, pinning, appendage alterations, drilling, sawing and fabrication.

Category 7 – Bonus Points (5 Possible)

·       I have a cohesive theme! (You should read my short story I wrote!)

·       My display board functions as a carrying tray, but also a kewl themed tray!

·       (I have painted for Frontline Gaming, and Warhammer Studio! Shhhh)

Ratsniff Cheesecurd by Noah J

Starting off just as a lineman Ratsniff Cheesecured has become the best Skaven player in history. He is smaller than other rats and so he was picked on every day he went to a game. The other players stated he could not be a player because of his size. One day when he was at a game against the orks, half of his tail was ripped off which is why he has such a small tail. Outraged, Ratsniff was injured and could not play for many months. But, he did not use his time uselessly… no indeed! His burning wheel of firedesire and anger made him train every day. With anger coursing through his veins and fighting through the pain, he became one of the richest and strongest Skaven all star players in the world. Which brings him to where we are now; prepare yourselves because this angry rat is coming for you!

Proper Venerable Chaplain Dreadnought Livery Conversion!!!

What a GREAT time to be involved in the world of Warhammer 40,000 and the current competitive scene!  It has been such a wonderful experience being involved these past few years, enjoying a hobby that I absolutely love!!! However, as the world of competitive 40k starts to become more "standardized" sometimes there are expectations that can bring some challenges as we adapt.

Being a dedicated Deathwatch player, and having to be creative with the limited unit choices we have to bring to bare, my fellow Xenos hunters have been aware of the Venerable Chaplain Dreadnought for some time.

With the recent change in the meta to be Space Marine Heavy, it seems that the world-at-large has discovered the Venerable Chaplain Dred... and now they are very difficult to find, and I think Forgeworld might have even discontinued them! Soooo... what is one to do?!  Well, here is a suitable conversion that is equitable in size, and (in this hobbyist's opinion) might just fit the bill!

Here is a side-by-side comparison of my conversion on the left, Deathwatch Chaplain Venerable Dreadnought, Gormann the Elder of the Crimson Fists; and the actual Venerable Chaplain Dreadnought borrowed from a friend!

Now, lets get into the actual build! You will need: 1) the Blood Angel Death Company Dreadnought Sarcophagus, and 2) the Blood Angel Furioso Sarcophagus!

Next, you will need to separate the center part of the Death Company Sarcophagus from the side panels, and do the same for the Furioso Sarcophagus! Be careful not to trim too far into the structure of the pieces you will need to glue together!

If you haven't already built the main body of the Sarcophagus, you will want to do that next.  Now glue one of the "winged" panels of the Librarian Sarcophagus to the body.

Next, glue the other "winged" panel of the Furioso Dreadnought to the body.

Now, you will want to put in the Death Company Sarcophagus center piece, making sure it fits before gluing it down.  You can always do a little trimming if need be to get a snug fit!

You may need to put in some green-stuff to take-care of any "major" mistakes.  Now, using your modeling glue to secure the center piece down, put some glue in between the panels and centerpiece to chemically "weld" it together the pieces together! Voila!!

Now, I can put either two close combat weapons on with dual Storm Bolters...

Or, I can put a heavy weapon... like a Lascannon!!!

Now we have a very convincing conversion, using all Games Workshop parts, for a solid Chaplain Venerable Dreadnought Conversion for competitive play! Now go out there and get some "For the Emperor!!!"

Kicking Assassinorum!

A few months ago, Games Workshop announced new rules to bring back the Officio Assassinorum in the table top game Warhammer 40,000 (or 40K) as a playable force.  They have been unplayable and virtually absent for almost two whole editions!  It has been so fun bringing back these operatives and, as an Inquisition player, they have been a nice-flexible contingency unit(s) to add back into my Deathwatch army!  The new rules, and ability to bring them as a one-off force, or as a whole Vanguard attack force, has been fluffy fun but also game changing at times.  Here is the quad left to right: Culexus, Vindicare, Callidus, and Eversor!

Deployment of one (or all) of the Officio Assassinorum can strike fear into the heart of an opponant!

The Culexus Assassin's Animus speculum can target Psychers with deadly accuracy, but his "soul horror" presence can cause the enemy to freeze with fear, while their allies hack down the foe in hand-to-hand combat!

The Vindicare is a sniper-extraordinaire: with his spy mask, and Executor Rifle coupled with turbo penetrator rounds, no Leader, Captain, Sergeant, or Field Commander is safe from his deadly aim!

The Callidus Assassin is uniquely equipped with Polymorphine drugs enabling her to "shape-change" and assume the identity of enemy combatants and leaders... think that is a Commisar leading your troupe? Think again!!! She materializes out of nowhere, taking the lives of those that oppose the Emperor of mankind!

The Eversor is a Hyper-metabolised Assassin, equipped with an executioner pistol and neurogauntlet, able to get into to close-quarters in the blink of an eye! One minute you think you are safe... the next moment you are dead!

Hope you enjoyed glancing at these models!

Here is a link to more info on the assassins with the info about each temple they come from: 

https://warhammer40k.fandom.com/wiki/Officio_Assassinorum